Broken, but hopeful

Hi. Assalamualaikum.


I'm in the university lab right now just preparing for my phd progress presentation seminar scheduled next week. I have to be honest Ramadhan has been a little difficult for me this year. I'm in the last semester of my phd studies so work has been hectic plus lots of things are in my mind right now apart of the phd matters of course. My mind just isn't working like it suppose to. I kept thinking about other stuff and it is really affecting me. My sleep timing is horrible. Like today, I slept at around 1.30AM, woke up at 4.30AM to prepare sahoor/fajr and I just couldn't sleep after that until now. So I went directly to the lab. But I'm determined to not give up on myself just yet on this blessed month. 14 days may have already passed, but there's still time for me to turn my Ramadhan around, and I hope anyone else who's not been feeling/giving 100% to their Ramadhan, please don't give up too. As for me, I just need to focus my mind on the important things and just let go of certain things.

Anyways, these past few days have been extremely eye-opening for me because I have done some self-reflection about the good and the wrongs that I have done throughout my life. There are just some things that I really regret doing it and the fact that I just need to keep moving on with my life with the decisions that I already made in the past is just so hurting. Through these times, I just need someone for guidance and advice. Well, talking about this 'someone', I don’t actually have many friends, but I do have a very close friend that is like an older sister to me and that I know will be there for me through good and bad times. We fought hard, we love hard too. We fought for months last year and ended up not talking until I came back from Japan. But after that, we were just good like nothing happened. She knows I have problems without the need for me to say it. She knows I'm hurting even though I'm smiling. She will scold me if I made wrong decisions in my life but willing to give advice and provides ways to solve problems or heal from the pain of the decisions that I've made.

I have my own secrets, worries, struggles, and dark pasts that I'm not willing to open up to other people. And sometimes I hide certain parts of myself by masking it with humor, smiling, or by laughing a little too much because I was afraid that if I don't, then people will start to catch on and they will start to know my pain, ache, anxiety, and grief. Well, no one is 100% as who they seem to be. But, I also learned that those who truly love you for who you are, won't mind not even one bit. And it is the people who love us unconditionally, that will actually say, "It's okay, I got you." And most importantly, I also learned that Allah, the One who loves us the most, who loves us unconditionally, already knows what truly lies in our hearts. In fact, He is the One who will hold us on days when tears just can't stop flowing. He will be the One embracing us at times when we are just too tired to put an act when we just can't be bothered to show our strength. Allah is the only One who truly knows you 100% and that with Him, you no longer need to pretend.

The one that is broken, but hopeful. Afraid, but anticipating. And so in need of His Love.

Thank you for a good friend. Thank you for You.

Regards,
efs


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Little do you know by Alex & Sierra

Little do you know
How I’m breaking while you fall asleep
Little do you know
I’m still haunted by the memory
Little do you know
I’m trying to pick myself from piece by piece
Little do you know
I need a little more time
Underneath it all I’m held captive by the hole inside
I’ve been holding back
For the fear that you might change your mind
I’m ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight
Little do you know
I need a little more time
I love you like you've never felt the pain
I promise you don’t have to be afraid
The love you see right here stays so lay your head on me
Little do you know
I know you’re hurt while I'm sound asleep
Little do you know
All my mistakes are solely drowning me
Little do you know
I’m trying to make it better piece by piece
Little do you know
I, I love you till the sun dies
Away, just wait
I love you like I've never felt the pain, just wait
I love you like I’ve never been afraid, just wait
Our love we see right here stays so lay your head on me
I love you like you've never felt the pain
I promise you don’t have to be afraid
The love you see right here stays so lay your head on me
Lay your head on me
So lay your head on me
'Cause little do you know
I love you till the sun dies

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Ramadhan, a month of relection and forgiveness. A new start.

Hi. Assalamualaikum.


Today is the 12th day of Ramadhan in the year 2018. Today, I decided to be active again, here. I’ve done a lot of self reflection throughout this Ramadhan. Reflecting the bad and the good things that I’ve done. I’ve come to the realization that I’m no longer young. I’m no longer 23, I’m 30 now. The way I think is no longer the same as before. I’m much more matured in dealing with life as I have encountered various situations these past 7 years. 

I kept thinking what I’m going to do with my life. I know the purpose of life is not just about ourself, but also about how we manage the relationship between humans. I wanted myself to have an impact in others life. In a good way ofcourse. I hope the stories that I shared hear will help others in their life. To help people to get back up after a hurtful fall. To see life in a different perspective. In a positive way. And to be a better person. Because life is short and we need to cherish it.

Previously, the reason that I started this blog is because I know my dad will be reading it. And another person is my ex.  I’m not good in expressing myself. This is like a medium to share all my thoughts. But both of them were no longer in my life. My dad died, and my ex obviously an ‘ex’. I don’t think he would be reading this blog any longer. 

So the reason why I wanted to re-start this blog is no longer about the people that I love, but for myself instead. 

Regards,
Efs


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Heartbroken

Hi. Assalamualaikum.


Today I just wanted to share something about being heartbroken. Well, I’m sure everyone has experienced it before atleast once. Me, myself has experienced it multiple times. But today I just wanted to share that one time that I was really heartbroken. It was 7 years back. I’m sure not many people actually knows that I ‘pernah dirisik’ but the relationship just didn’t workout. I’m not here to tell you why exactly it didn’t workout. But I wanted to share with you guys how it actually impacted my life.

It is always my dream to be marrying someone that is religious and smart. I wanted someone that could actually guide me to ‘jannah’. Back then, I thought I have found one. Someone perfect. Religious and smart just like what i ever wanted. He also suggest me to join usrah to help improve myself.  But I was just not ready for it. Why? I will tell you about this in another post. He was my first real love. We lasted for 2 years. He makes me happy and has been there for me through the last year of my degree and masters degree, and also when my father died. Not just him, but his family too. They were all really nice people. Fast forward, things happened. Something that really broke my heart. I suffered alone as I was living away from home, from my family, and it was just 5 months after my father died. I returned the ‘risik’ ring back. Maybe the way I ended it was not proper enough. I didn’t met him and confronted him face to face. I’m sure the decision that I’ve make broke his heart too. I blame my immaturity at the age of 23 for the decision that I’ve made. Few years later, I told this story to a ‘sister’ very close to me. She said I was naive and immature to ended it just because of some small things. But I took it as fate and that ‘kami tak ada jodoh’. 

Back to the original story how it actually impacted my life. Because I was really heartbroken at that time, I told two things to myself. First, it is okay to not having someone that is religious enough to guide you, maybe Allah wanted you to guide others instead. Second, it is okay to not having someone that is smart and have a good job because money doesn’t always gives you happiness. But guys, be careful with your tongue because the things that you said may become a ‘dua’. Allah will always test you on the things that you scared of or think the most. 

Why i told this story now? It is because my heart is not at ease these couple few days. I kept thinking about it and dreaming about it. Something that I have been forgetting for years. I felt guilt. But then i realized that Ramadhan is a month of reflection. This is my life reflection and I wanted to make up to it. 

Salam Ramadhan everyone. May this Ramadhan be better than before. Ameen.

Regards,
Efs

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Nilai sebuah kemaafan

Memaafkan bukanlah mudah. Kita manusia fitrahnya sentiasa  berteman khilaf. Yang selalu kalah dengan ujian yang Allah beri. Kita ini manusia, yang selalu bersembunyi di balik dinding bernama mangsa. Kita ini manusia, yang tidak mahu memaafkan hanya beralasan ‘kita bukan nabi, kita manusia biasa’ .
-
Kita sebenarnya lupa. Yang menggerakkan sesuatu itu adalah Allah. Hati manusia, seperti saya, seperti dia, seperti semua, dipegang oleh Allah. Tiada satu pun yang akan terjadi tanpa izin dariNya. Setiap sesuatu, telah dirancang Allah sebaiknya. Baik atau buruk hanyalah di mata kita, manusia yang terhijab dari segala kebaikan yang Allah telah aturkan.
-
Tersiratnya, andai kita fikir kita dizalimi oleh manusia, lalu enggan pula memaafkannya, maka kitalah sebenarnya yang zalim kerana sedikit sebanyak, kita ini menuduh perancangan dan gerakan Allah itu zalim. Nauzubillahiminzalik. Astagfirullah.
-
Sedangkan Allah, pemilik segala sesuatu di langit dan bumi, sedia mengampunkan dosa hatta setinggi gunung. Sedangkan Allah, di dalam al-Quran berkali kali menegaskan yang dia Maha Pengampun, lagi Maha Penyayang. Sedangkan Dia, yang mahu hambaNya memohon ampun walau berkali-kali melakukan dosa. Tapi kita, hanya hamba yang kerdil, satu antara jutaan butiran pasir manusia, seakan-akan mahu menumpang hakNya, dengan tidak bersedia memaafkan manusia kerdil lain. Siapa kita? Siapa?
-
Benar, memaafkan memang tidak mudah. Memaafkan sedang hati masih berdarah kerana disakiti, memang sukar sekali. Ingatlah, jalan ke syurga itu tidak mudah. Mahu ke syurga itu perlu diselangi dengan jerih payah. Maka, perlu apa kita mengeluh kesah?
-
Percayalah, bila mana memaafkan maka perlahan-lahan rasa itu pasti datang. Rasa tenang. Rasa damai. Rasa lapang. Bila mana tangan ditadah, lalu memaafkan setulus hati, dapat dirasa hati bersorak girang. Hati terasa bebas dari dendam dan amarah kerana kita tidak lagi menangisi sesuatu yang telah terjadi.
-
#usrahsantai
#USsharing

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Nobody was there when i'm in need.

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amin..

Ya Allah Ya Rahman Ya Rahim…

Kau ampunilah segala dosa-dosa yang telah aku lakukan
Kau limpahkanlah aku dgn kesabaran yg tiada terbatas
Kau berikanlah aku kekuatan mental & fizikal
Kau kurniakanlah aku dgn sifat keredhaan
Kau peliharalah lidahku dari kata2 nista & keji
Kau kuatkanlah smngtku untk mnempuhi sgla cbrnMu
Kau berikanlah aku sifat kasih sesama insan..

Sekiranya suamiku ini adalah pilihanmu di Arash,
berikanlah aku kekuatan & keyakinan untk terus bersamanya..
Sekiranya suamiku ini adalh suami yg akn membimbingku di atas titianMu,
Kurniakanlh aku sifat kasih & redha di atas segala perbuatannya..
Sekiranya suamiku ini adalah bidadara untukku di Al-JannahMu,
Limpahknlh aku dgn sifat tunduk tawaduk akn segala perintahnya..
Sekiranya suamiku ini adalh yg terbaik untukku,
Peliharalh tngkh laku serta kata2 ku dri menyakiti perasaannya..
Sekiranya suami ku ini jodoh yg dirahmati olehMu,
Berilah aku kesabrn untk menghdpi segala karenah & ragamnya..

Tetapi Ya Allah..

Sekiranya suami ku ini ditakdirkn bukn hnya untk diriku seorg,
Kau tunjknlh aku jln yg terbaik untk aku harungi..
Sekiranya suami ku tergoda dgn keindhn duniamu,
Limphknlh aku kekuatnMu untk aku memperbetulkan keadaannya…
Sekiranya suamiku mencintai kesesatan,
Kau pandulah aku untk menarik dirinya keluar daripada terus terlena..

Ya Allah,
Engkau yg Maha Mengetahui akn apa yg terbaik untkku..
Engkau juga yg Maha Mengampuni segala kesilapn & keterlanjuranku..
Sekiranya aku tersilap dlm membuat sebarg keputusn
Bimbinglah aku ke jalan yg engkau redhai…
Sekiranya aku lalai dlm mnjlnkn tngungjwbku sbgai isteri,
Engkau hukumlah aku di dunia,tetapi bukan di akhiratMu..
Sekiranya aku engkar & derhaka,
Berikanlah aku petunjuk ke arah rahmatMu..

Ya Allah..Sesungguhnya
Aku lemah tanpa petunjukMu..
Aku buta tanpa bimbinganMu..
Aku cacat tanpa hidayahMu..
Aku hina tanpa rahmatMu..

Kuatkanlh hati & semangtku,
Tabhkn aku menghdpi sgla cubaan dari Mu..
Jadiknlh aku isteri yg disenangi oleh suamiku..
Bukaknlh pintu hatiku untk menghayati agamaMu..
Bimbinglh aku agar mnjd isteri yg solehah..
Hanya pdMu Ya Allah ku pohon segla hrpn..
Krna aku pasrah dgn dugaanMu..
Krna aku sedar betapa hinanya diriku..
Krna aku seorg insan yg kerap keliru..
Krna aku leka dgn keindahn duniaMu..
Krna kurg kesabarnku mnghdpi cbrnmu..
Krna pendk akalku mnghrungi ujianMu..

Ya Allah Ya Rahman Ya Rahim…
Aku hnya ingn mnjd isteri yg dirhmti,
Isteri yg dikasihi,
Isteri yg solehah,
Isteri yg sentiasa di hati suami…

Amin amin Ya Robbal Alamin…

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Things have changed.

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:)


JIHAD terbesar bagi seorang wanita adalah menjadi isteri dan ibu kepada anak-anaknya. Itulah sebab mengapa wanita itu perlu merindukan sebuah 'pernikahan', kerana 
dengan pernikahan, dia sudah menyempurnakan separuh agamanya. 
Dan seorang suami adalah kehormatan baginya, 
jalan untuk meraih JannahNya.."

^_^

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nuff-nang

Assalamualaikum (:

Its been so long since the last update minus the honeymoon picture post due to my so-called hectic schedule nowadays. Siapa kata bila dah kahwin office akan bagi less work? That is all lies la people. Haha. Ouh and today I am a bit rajin to check out my blog and my nuffnang earnings. Sampai dah tak ingat dah password. Can you imagine the last time I check my nuffnang sampai lupa-lupa ni. Of course la kan, the last time I check the earnings was just scents. Mestilah nak tengok dah tak ada mood. But today the total reached RM24.74. See? Its a good feeling that there are people who still reading this 'not updated' blog. Tq people! Tq followers! Ouh ya and tq stalkers! ;p

Before this ingat semangat nak update blog thru iPad je. But the feeling was just so different you know. Tak best macam kat laptop boleh edit2 gambar and put those pink signature of mine. All these will lead to post with only blurr pictures and no words. U see when you want to upload pictures from your iPad to your facebook or your blogs, the pictures akan jadi a lil bit blurr. Siapa yang suka tengok picture blurr2 ni? None right! So this one will lead to a blog without any updated post. Like what happen right now. (:


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Honeymoon!

Live from hard rock hotel penang (:

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counting.

Another 10 days more. Gosh!

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To all those suffering from sadness or depression, know that it isn’t your fault. It isn’t because you’re weak. It isn’t because you’re just not grateful enough. It isn’t because you’re just not religious enough. It isn’t because you don’t have enough faith. It isn’t because God is angry with you. To all the well-meaning people who tell you this, just smile. And know deep in your heart that the tests of God come in different forms to different people. And know that, by the help of God, every test can become a tool to get closer to Him. And that, verily, with hardship come ease–and like all things of this world–this too shall pass.

:')

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Engagement day: PART 3

;p

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Engagement day: PART 2

Assalamualaikum (:

Hantaran pihak lelaki. Theme black + pink

THE RINGS.. Left hand side cincin tunang, right hand side cincin risik.

The tepak sireh =)

The baju nikah, kain beaded chiffon. Habis duit T_T
 Sekarang baru terfikir kenapa beli warna cream? Putih lagi nampak suci la..

The fruit cake~

The buah-buahan yang dah tak nampak buah. Kenapa? Sebab buah dah letak dalam peti ais ;D

The YUMMY chocolate! Ni lagi la tinggal kotak, coklat dah dalam perut ;p

Next, PART 3!

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Engagement day: PART 1

Assalamualaikum (:

Kenapa part 1? Sebab ini versi gambar dari BB Bold 9780 aje. Nak versi gambar photographer, kena tunggu part seterusnya la ok!


The house :)
Tiba-tiba jadi macam garden theme pulak. Sebenarnya saving tak nak pasang khemah. Tapi saya suka! And the colour ala-ala kuning diraja ;D

No pelamin bagai. Simple is better right!

The hantarans. Homemade okay~ Special credit to my mom, akak ipar and abang (:

The sireh junjung by sister-in-law. TQ!

The buah-buahan by my mom. Baru tahu pisang kaki ni mahal okay~ Sebiji 4 ringgit! Sape tak tahu? Yang macam tomato warna oren tu..

Tiba-tiba malu nak letak gambar sendiri. Tunggu part 2 la. Stay tuned!~ Haha.

**Orang lain beraya haji, ni sebok-sebok nak tunang ;p**

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majlis anugerah akademik univ 2010 ;)



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down

what ever happens i have to stay strong.

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tweet tweet!

i'm back from hiatus!



account lama, baru reti guna ;p

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cool aje

If you are successful, you will win some false friends
and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway...


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Hari Sabtu yang indah

Assalamualaikum :)

Hari ni hari Sabtu, dan saya sedang................... berKERJA. Perasan tak, perasan tak, sekarang saya amat malas update blog. Balik kerja saya tertido. Ini bad habit. Sila jangan tiru. Nanti otak lembab tidur lepas asar. 40 hari nanti boleh jadi gila. Lepas tu dengar kata nanti jin geget *betul ke* Tak nak tidur dah la lepas ni...

Tapi kan....bila tak update blog lagi ramai orang follow. Mungkin orang lebih suka saya tak update blog kan? Kaaaan? Okay fine! Fine! Tak nak update dah~ konon-konon workaholic.

Next week masuk gaji kedua! Yeay! Memang saya akan mengabaikan kan blog lah next week ;p

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hai, this is my card...

Assalamualaikum =)

Kad nama saya sudah siap! Siapa nak, bayar singgit okeh walaupon saya buat dapat free sebenarnya ;p




Sukeeeee~ Walaupon sebenarnya tak tahu nak bagi siapa. Simpan untuk diri sendiri je la ^_^

Ouh btw, next semester saya kena mengajar subjek instrumentation and measurement. Subjek first year tu. Kena ingat balik subjek yang dah 5 tahun lepas -_-" Tapi nasib baik macam ok la. Less calculation, more to theory. Hahaha. Budak first year pulak tu. Confirm adik-adik. Tak kan ada student first year sama umur plak kan. Mesti baik-baik. Kalau baru first year dah teruk perangai tak tahu nak kata ape la.

Okay itu sahaja. Saya busy ni. Baibai!

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saya sangat malu hari ini.. esok mungkin malu lagi..

Assalamualaikum (:

Saya kat ofis, baru lepas present projek master. Fiuh~ Ingat dah kerja tak payah present dah. Sekali tengok haaaa lagi teruk. Dulu present master 2 panel je. Ni sampai 20 panel. Present dekat lecturer-lecturer FKE semuanya -_-"

Soalan pon lagi banyak dari present master.

Hukhukhuk. Mentang-mentang gue first time present kat lecturer-lecturer sini, mengajar pon tak lagi. Ceys mesti jadi bahan lepas ni. Takpe2, tengok korang present macam mana pulak kan.

Lepas ni nak rehat-rehat tido-tido. Minggu ni banyak gila kerja. Semalam jaga exam malam, habis 10.30. Sampai rumah dah nak dekat pukul 11 malam. Last-last makan malam pukul 11.30. Nak prepare presentation untuk hari ni memang dah tak larat la. Hari-hari bangun pukul 6. Tidur pukul 12 lebih. Memang la tak cukup tidur kan :'(

Mulai esok nak ganti tidur!

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Slip gaji pertama saya

Assalamualaikum (=

Rupa-rupanya dah sebulan dah kerja..


Sulit okay!!!!!

SULIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!!!!!!

Jadi tak dapat nak tunjuk dalam. Hehe.

Tunggu slip gaji lagi dua dah boleh tukar kereta! Hahaha.

*Tapi sedih tak sempat belanja arwah ayah dengan gaji pertama. Arwah ayah yang nak sangat saya jadi pensyarah. Terima kasih sebab hantar saya belajar bagus-bagus sampai jadi macam sekarang. Cukup segala makan minum. Tak pernah hidup susah.*


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Tak nak cakap tak nak

Sangat pressure bila tiba-tiba disuruh jadi MC.
Kenapa tadi depan-depan tak reti nak menolak permintaan orang.
Dah balik baru menyesal tak nak jadi.
Dengan skrip semua takde.
What if I end up dengan teks ucapan yang memalukan.

Hari ni tidur awal.
Esok nak bangun pagi.
Harap-harap tiba-tiba ada orang ganti.

Haha.

Terbang di awan burung jentayu,
Di atas papan batang jerami,
Tampillah tuan kami merayu,
Bersama ucapan kata perasmi.

Okay, tak dapat bayang kan kena berpantun macam ni esok.

T_T

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talking to the mOon

Assalamualaikum (:

Its been 2 weeks now since I started working and tomorrow I'm working on Saturday. Time flies so fast and I'm missing my past.

T_T







I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away
I want you back
I want you back
My neighbors think
I'm crazy
But they don't understand
You're all I have
You're all I have
 
At night when the stars
light up my room
I sit by myself

Talking to the Moon
Trying to get to You
In hopes you're on
the other side
Talking to me too
Or am I a fool
who sits alone
Talking to the moon

I'm feeling like I'm famous
The talk of the town
They say
I've gone mad
Yeah
I've gone mad
But they don't know
what I know
Cause when the
sun goes down
someone's talking back
Yeah
They're talking back

At night when the stars
light up my room
I sit by myself
Talking to the Moon
Trying to get to You
In hopes you're on
the other side

Talking to me too
Or am I a fool
who sits alone
Talking to the moon

Do you ever hear me calling?
Cause every night
I'm talking to the moon
Still trying to get to you

In hopes you're on
the other side
Talking to me too
Or am I a fool
who sits alone

Talking to the moon

I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away

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thanx for being so friendly~

Assalamualaikum (:

Hari ni satu hari buat saya tergelak bila call student-student ex-UTeM untuk buat survey for Engineering Acreditation Council. Macam-macam perangai ada. How it makes me feel everyone has their own uniqueness. Kelebihan diri masing-masing as long as budi bahasa tu ada. Bila orang cakap baik-baik, kita balas baik-baik. Dan kebanyakan yang saya call tadi sangat very the friendly! ^_^

Orang call nak buat survey tapi dia boleh plak ajak sembang. Eventhough tak kenal pon sape.

Ayat biasa pemula bicara standard macam ni...

Saya: Hello assalamualaikum. Encik .....................? Saya dari FKE UTeM. So encik busy tak sekarang?

Ada satu student ni memang buat saya tergelak la. Our conversation macam ni.. Dah halfway through survey tu dah and suddenly..

Student A: Erm jap eh. Saya nak confirmkan la. Sebab macam pelik je. Takot ni yang macam kat radio tu. Ala yang kene-kene kan orang tu~
Saya: Ha? Betul la. Awak ingat ni Hot FM ke. Hahaha.
*Ini bila student selalu sangat dengar radio atau tengok rancangan macam ni =_="*

Student B: Cik ni siapa?
Saya: Saya lecturer baru.
Student B: Betul ke ni?
Saya: Eh betul la.
Student B: Cik ajar subjek apa?
*Ini sudah confuse siapa yang survey siapa sebenarnya*


Student B lagi: So cik kenal encik ..................? Jumpa dia kena la tadah telinga. Hahaha.
Saya: Eh kenapa?
Student B lagi: Dia suka bagi nasihat panjang berjela. Hahaha.
Saya: Huhu. Ouh yeke.
Student B lagi: Ok la cik. Kirim salam kat semua orang kat FKE!!!!!
Saya: Huhu. Baik lah ;)
Student B: Kalau ada apa-apa, call la lagi! Haha.
*Ini tak pasal-pasal dia start gossip pulak*

Saya: Lepas ni soalan yes or no je okeh? Are you willing to sacrifice your time/money/effort to help those who are in need?
Student C: No
Saya: Ha?!! Sanggupkah awak mengorbankan masa dan wang untuk membantu mereka yang memerlukan?
Student C: Eh yes yes! Hehe.
*Ini tak tahu lah tak dengar ke apa*

Saya: Does the nature of your work require the knowledge you obtained in your undergraduate studies?
Student D: Eh cik cik. Cuba jangan baca soalan. Buat ayat sendiri.
*Ini lagi la isk. Boleh pulak nasihatkan orang*

Saya: Sanggupkah awak mengorbankan masa dan wang untuk membantu mereka yang memerlukan?
Student E: Siapa eh yang memerlukan? Hehe.
Saya: Siapa-siapa aje lah~ =_="

Student F: Cik nama apa?
Saya: Erm.. saya.. erm.. adalah~ Haha.
*Tiba-tiba busy body. Tak perlu tahu nama lah*

Saya: Sudah bekerja atau sambung belajar?
Student G: Saya belajar. Kat UTeM ni lah~
Saya: Ouh I see. Nape tak kerja?
Student G: Erm sebab saya nak sambung belajar la. Haha.
Saya: Haha. Yelah2 okay...

Dan banyak lagi conversation yang macam comel-comel. Ops ini semua student laki. Student perempuan nama kat bawah-bawah pulak. Tak sempat call lagi ;)

******

Tapi balik kerja tadi telah hilang mood happy-happy disebabkan rakyat malaysia yang sengat very the rude. Tengah tunggu line nak isi minyak. Dia potong line then dia pulak tak puas hati. Siap hon-hon. Giler ke ape weyy? Wife pon sama aje muka masam macam apa. Keluar kereta pergi bayar memang dah geram giler. Sorry la sebab terjeling muka tak puas hati kat wife dia. Patu sembang-sembang dengan pakcik petronas tolong pump minyak tu. See~ Pakcik tu pon tak puas hati giler. Siap kata macam tu la rakyat malaysia yang tak berbudi bahasa. Nak kata hensem, tak. Nak kata kaya, kereta lama je. Dah tu nak berlagak sangat ape hal hah? Orang lain pon nak cepat jugak, penat jugak baru balik kerja!

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Ini kisah hari pertama

Assalamualaikum (:

Ini cerita hari pertama saya berkerja lima hari yang lepas. Nak tahu tak? Nak tahu tak? Okeh macam ni. Hari pertama sudah semestinya semangat bukan. Bangun awal pagi dan gerak dari rumah sewa seawal 7.30 pagi oleh kerana jalan ke UTeM pon tak pasti lagi. Surat tawaran minta report duty jam 8 pagi. Jadi orang macam saya yang lurus dan sentiasa mengikut peraturan mestilah datang sebelum 8 pagi. Tengok-tengok dari rumah ke universiti hanya mengambil masa less than 10 minit! Tak sangka sungguh begitu dekat =_=". Apatah lagi student-student di sini memandu dengan begitu laju sekali. Tahu lah jalan ke UTeM besar dan kosong. Sungguh tak selesa bila kereta belakang follow begitu dekat. Nak potong, potong lah kan! Tapi nak tak nak terbawak laju sekali ;)

Oh ya tapi sila jangan terpedaya. Itu cuma hari pertama. Hari kedua saya gerak dari rumah 7.45 pagi. Hari ketiga pula 7.50 pagi. Hari keempat pula 7.55 pagi. Hari kelima esok agak-agak pukul berapa? Haha. Kalau datang pukul 8 lebih tu memang majoriti parking staf banyak kosong lagi lah.Kat sini punch card kerja at least sekali sehari either masa datang atau waktu balik. Nak dua kali pon boleh. So kiranya tidak kira jam berapa punch card asalkan punch sekali. Faham tak ni? Faham tak?

Tapi nama je punch card ye, sebenarnya tidak perlu punch-punch pon. Nasib baik saya tidak memalukan diri di hari pertama cuba punch-punch di main entrance FKE. Cuma dekat kan kad matrix staf anda seperti touch n go sehingga terdengar bunyi 'tinit' 'tininit' 'tinininit' 'tiiiiiiiiiiiiiit'. Okay tipu je, sebenarnya bunyi sekali sahaja ye. Bunyi banyak-banyak kali tu kalau main scan banyak-banyak kali. Tapi kalau nak buat sila pastikan tiada student di sekitar. Nanti kena ngutuk jah.

Mula-mula report duty di pejabat pendaftar bangunan canselori. Rupa-rupanya ada dua bahagian pejabat pendaftar okay. Pagi-pagi saya telah memalukan diri masuk salah tempat. Jadi lain kali jika tidak tahu sila tebalkan muka tanya orang. Mungkin akan kurang malu sedikit daripada masuk salah tempat.
  
 Inilah bangunan canselori. Sumber: facebook ^_^ Cuma saya ubah tone colour mengikut citarasa~

Kemudian baru report duty di FKE.


Dekat fakulti ni lagi lah macam cemas sebab first time datang dan tak tahu nak punch card mana, office kat mana. Tapi masuk sahaja buat muka confident dan tanya akak kat counter bawah tu.

Saya: Erm nak tanya, lapor diri staf kat mana ya?
Kakak: Ouh erm jawatan tutor ke?
Saya: Erm tak tak lecturer.

Heheh. Nak juga cakap. Student kat sebelah dah pandang. Dalam hati nak je cakap ape pandang-pandang? Tahu lah sebenarnya I nampak lagi muda dari u kan! Kan kan! Nasib baik taw I pakai high heels nampak tinggi sikit.

Then lepas tu lapor diri kat tingkat atas.

Jumpa dekan.

Jumpa timbalan dekan akademik.

Jumpa ketua jabatan.
Okeh jom jom jemput masuk bilik pula.


Knock! Knock!

Masuk! *dah prektis dah ni*


Inilah bilik saya, buat sementara waktu. Haha. Besor tak besor tak. Kerusi pon berplastik lagi. Sebenarnya bilik ni share dua orang. Dalam bulan enam nanti baru tukar bilik sorang tunggu jurutera pengajar keluar.

So dats all! Cerita hari pertama saya. Yep yep I know~ Saya tahu sungguh bosan~


Sekian sahaja dari Cik Ezreen Farina.

Semalam ada staf pusat komputer call. Helluuuu boleh bercakap dengan Puan Ezreen Farina. Rela tak rela iye kan je lah =_="

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award

Assalamualaikum (:

Dapat phone call semalam, dari SPS.
School of Graduate Studies UTM.
Ingat nak tanya tentang yuran konvo.
Nasib baik tak complain sebab dah lama bayar.

Rupa-rupanya dapat Best Student Award.
         * tak sangka
Masa dalam phone memang rasa gembira.
Tapi lepas tu macam dah tak rasa apa-apa.
Arwah ayah tak dapat tengok semua ni :')

But still, alhamdulillah.
Rezeki orang lain-lain.

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Hey, bayar saman on9 lebih mudah!

Assalamualaikum (:

Semalam pergi pos ofis.

Lamaaaaaaa sangat nak tunggu nombor. Orang bayar saman punye pasal! Eh lupe, saya pon baru nak bayar saman :"> Saman tahun 2007, tahun 2011 baru nak bayar. Isk ape nak jadi. Nak buat macam mana, surat apa pon tak bagi. Tapi akhirnya balik je tak bayar pon. Tak kuasa you nak tunggu berjam-jam. Baek bayar online... Haaa~ Kini semuanya lebih mudah dengan cimbclicks. Tapi kena charge extra 2 ringgit la.

So semalam dah settlekan bayar saman dengan yuran konvo sekali! Banyak duit keluar bulan ni. Duit masuknya tak ada. Haish..

..... Bila result interview nak keluar ni T_T

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Happy birtday to?

Assalamualaikum (:

Weekend lepas birthday saya. Cepat! Say......

Happy Birthday to Me!!

... yang keduabelas tahun. Eceh tipu! Patutnya terbalikkan dua dengan satu tu jadi duapuluhsatu tahun. Baru nampak logik sikit walaupon sebenarnya sudah duapuluhtiga tahun. Tiba-tiba malu, sebab tu gambar kicik :">

Okay yang sebenarnya birthday anak buah. Maaf, kek sudah comot-comot baru mahu ambil gambar. Sebelum tu sibuk makan. Tapi memang sedap la kek ni! Very the colourful :)

Konfius tak konfius tak mana satu yang 12, mane satu yang 21 plus plus

;p

Ehem ini iklan. Letak la gambar orang lain jugak. Nanti kata semua nak letak muka ni je =_="
This is birthday girl yang sudah hilang tudung dengan my big sis.

Ini pula anak buah saya yang comels. Orang lain sibuk prepare kat bawah pagi tu, korang rehat-rehat tengok tv kat atas yer. Ini tidak adil! Tapi jangan salah faham taw, orang yang ambil gambar ini bukan rehat-rehat, cuma naik sekejap nak ambil gambar. Taw~ Taw~

Akhir sekali, lepas majlis hari jadi ada buat tahlil untuk arwah ayah. Terima kasih yang sudi datang! Overall yang datang adalah pakcik makcik dan budak-budak kecik. Kesian Alisya takde kawan datang ;p Hadiah pon tak banyak. Pakcik makcik datang bagi duit je. Kaya la tu, dah tak boleh minta duit kat maksu!


ps: kenapa gambar-gambar tangkap pakai iphone ni blurr. Tak bagus! Kalau saya baik beli camera yang gambar lawa dari iphone ^_^

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Carrot cake with cream cheese topping

Assalamualaikum (:

People's choice!

... sekarang tidak perlu lagi beli di secret recipe bila boleh masak sendiri ...


Bahan Kek
1 1/4 cwn minyak jagung (minyak masak pun boleh)
4 biji telur
120 gm gula castor
120 gm gula perang
100 gm walnut cincang
1 cawan kismis kuning
1 1/2 cawan carrot yang disagat
250 gm tepung**
1 sudu kecil baking soda**
1/4 sudu kecil serbuk kulit kayu manis**
1/4 sudu kecil garam

Bahan Topping
250 gm cream cheese
100 gm butter
100 gm gula icing
sedikit perahan lemon - ikut suka

Penyediaan Kek

  1. pukul telur sehingga kembang. masukkan minyak, gula castor dan perang, sebatikan - tak perlu sampai gula hancur.
  2. masukkan walnuts, kismis, carrot, sebatikan.
  3. masukkan bhn bertanda ** (yang telah diayak), garam, ke dalam adunan no 2. Guna spatula(sudu) plastik atau kayu untuk kaup-balikkan adunan. hati-hati, jangan kotorkan tempat! hehe.
  4. masukkan dalam loyang berukuran 9 inch yang telah disapukan mentega/dialas kertas minyak.
  5. bakar selama 45 minit pada suhu 180C. check kek guna garfu untuk tahu sudah masak atau belum. Bila dh masak, sejukkan di luar oven.

Penyediaan Topping

  • masukkan semua bhn dlm blender/mixer.
  • bila kek dah sejuk, sapukan atas kek. Sejukkan dalam fridge baru potong untuk dihidangkan.

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Cream puff

Assalamulaikum (:

Ini resipi basi. Sudah lama buat tapi baru mahu share. Semuanya kerana konon-konon prepare untuk interview. Ada request cerita tentang interview hari tu, tapi nanti-nanti la. Sudah dapat result yang best baru mahu cerita. Kalau tak best tak mahu cerita. Okay? c:

Sekarang cepat sediakan kertas dan pensel untuk menyalin resipi!

Pastry
250ml air
125g butter
150g tepung - diayak
¼ st garam
1 st gula
4 biji telur

sedikit serbuk penaik 

Custard
500ml susu segar
100g gula
80g tepung custard

Cara
Cream Puff
  1. Didihkan air dan butter hingga cair. Kemudian masukkan tepung yang diayak. Gaul sebati hingga adunan tidak melekat di periuk. Angkat dan sejukkan.
  2. Bila sejuk pukul sedikit and masukkan telur sebijik sebijik.
  3. Masukkan adunan ke dalam beg piping.  Pipekan atas dulang yang telah digris. (Saya buat pakai sudu dan tangan sahaja)
  4. Bakar 25 minit dgn suhu 200˚C atau sehingga kekuningan. (Oven kena panaskan dulu ke suhu 200˚C. Kalau tak panas nanti puff tak kembang dan tak berongga kat dalam dia.)

Inti Custard
  1. Hangatkan susu dan gula atas api sederhana. Masukkan tepung kastard and kacau sehingga pekat.
  2. Custard tu boleh dipicitkan ke dalam puff tu bila puff tu sejuk sikit. Caranya, tebuk lubang kat puff (boleh buat kat atas atau kat bawah). Pastu gunakan piping bag yang berisi custard, picit ke dalam rongga puff tu. 
 Rasa tidak lengkap tanpa gambar bukan?

Ini serving suggestion, ala-ala hiasan hotel sikit-sikit ^_^

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